G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Directed by: Stephen Sommers

Cast: Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols, Marlon Wayans, Christopher Eccleston, Dennis Quaid,Brendan Fraser, Channing Tatum and Jonathan Pryce

OK! Here goes my attempt at salvaging this spoof they call a movie.

GI Joe-No story, but none was expected, what was expected was a choc-a-bloc action flick, with mind numbing stunts and special effects. Numb my mind they did, but not in the way expected, if it was not for those extremely loud sound effects there was nothing that could’ve kept me awake during this one.

What I fail to understand is, if the director was out to fill a movie wit CGI then why did he just not make a 3D cartoon movie. I am sure the cartoons would’ve portrayed the characters better. Over acting is an understatement here, the villain being over-villainous & the hero being over-zealous towards his cause of none other than, “saving the world”. One of these days I am going to give these super heroes a piece of my mind , because they are all at it and yet no one succeeds in “saving the world”!!!

Well well, getting back, one of the only good things I can say about this movie is that Sienna Miller looks smoking hot and has a whole load of fun being the “bad girl”, but as cliché as always, madame is forced into a second-skin sort of Black Leather outfit. What has happened to that word we so often relate to the making of movies, IMAGINATION! They have the creative license too, but no! everyone wants to walk the tried and tested route.

The action shifts from dense forests, to the streets of France, to underwater locations, to above the clouds and many, many locations in between, and you sit there wondering how one shot leads to another?

They have also tried to add, a comic character, and an inter-racial romance, both these sub-plots

as out of place as the Queen of England in a theatre watching GI Joe. Someone please explain to the director that a hard core action flick can be made without any of the added sub plots for entertainment, but only if the special effects are good enough. Here I believe the special effects were also added to give the movie a more comedic effect, very amateur and quite clearly highlighting the fact that the budgets could not cover all the CGI.

I must explain at this point, no matter if you go in with expectations or with none, you will be disappointed my friend. It cannot even be stated that this is a movie that children can watch for entertainment, because believe me the cartoons on TV these days are way more technologically advanced. So I would like to advice that no one wastes their time on this one and spoils the image that we have of watching GI Joe as children and worshipping them, do not shatter that image they worked so hard to build.

Now comes the time for the all important verdict, I give it 3 BOP’s out of 10 , this comes after a lot of deliberation with myself, for no one deserves ½ out of 10, I was once in school as well, not a good feeling that one.

Avoid this flick!

Reviewed By,

Taru Girdonia

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Posted by Taru at 3:54 AM  |